ANDY, BLESSING AND THE 3 LEVELS OF HOLY KISS
(After the Church service)
Pastor: Sister Blessing, please see me after the workers’ meeting.
Blessing: OK Pastor.
(After the workers’ meeting)
Pastor: You are welcome Sis Blessing.
Blessing: Thank you Pastor.
Pastor: How was my preaching today?
Blessing: Wow! It was soooo lovely. I was really blessed.
Pastor: Just like your name… Blessing… Blessing…
Blessing: Pastor, you are so funny.
Pastor: Tell me what you gained in particular.
Blessing: Hmnn…That a believer must seek God’s face in every area of his life.
Pastor: Is that all?
Blessing: Hmnn…Oh yes… You quoted the Bible verse where Isaac was on the field… I think in the book of Genesis chapter…
Pastor (cuts in): Don’t worry about the chapter. Tell me what Isaac was doing on the field…
Blessing (hesitates a bit): Isaac was on the field with Rebecca…
Pastor (Leans forward): Sister Blessing, this is a bible study session. Tell me what Isaac was doing with Rebecca.
Blessing: They were playing according to the Bible verse…
Pastor: Tell me… I mean, describe how Isaac was playing with Rebecca.
Blessing: Pastor, Bible didn’t describe it.
Pastor: That is the problem with this generation. They fail to use their power of imagination. Are you not in the drama group?
Blessing: I am in the drama group but…
Pastor: Blessing, you need to enter into the character of these Bible characters to know and understand their feelings.
Blessing: OK sir.
Pastor: For instance, the Bible enjoins us to greet one another with holy kiss. Do you know the real meaning of that?
Blessing: No sir.
Pastor: You see… Do you respect the anointing in my life?
Blessing: Yes sir.
Pastor (rises up and sits near her): There are 3 different levels of holy kiss: Low level kiss, middle level kiss and the high level kiss. Apostle Paul didn’t explain it in details but I am here to show you the biblical standard.
Blessing: Pastor, everyone has gone home. Please, I have an appointment with a friend.
Pastor: Don’t you respect my anointing anymore? Is your friend more important than me?
Blessing: No sir.
Pastor: As I was saying, Isaac and Rebecca were in love and were enjoying themselves on the field. Paul also emphasised love through holy kiss. In fact, Apostle John, also known as Apostle of love talked about love in his epistles. In summary, love is sweet and beautiful.
Blessing: Andy, you are married with two kids!
Pastor: You called me Andy? Don’t you respect my anointing again?
Blessing: That is the result of lowering your standard. I am not one of those sisters you can win over and sleep with.
Pastor (quickly locks the door): Blessing, you must understand your Bible. I am here to teach you and do practicals with you.
Blessing: To teach me Bible by locking your door?
Pastor: In John Chapter 10, Jesus said, “I am the door.” I want to show you what happens when you close the door of your heart.
Blessing: Twisting the Bible for your selfish interest. I will shout if you don’t open the door.
Pastor (pleads with her): Blessing, I love you with the love of God.
Blessing: You have a responsible wife and kids. What else do you want?
Pastor: The Bible says, “Ask until your joy is full.” I love you.
Blessing: Pastor, do you know your problem? It is called lust.
Pastor (he tries to hold her when someone knocks the door): Who is there? Deliverance session is going on here!
Blessing: Pastor, it is my younger brother. He is my bodyguard. Will you end the deliverance session or not?
Pastor (His adrenaline level subsides and he shouts): In Jesus name we have prayed! (He opens the door and sees him smiling).
Blessing: Pastor, I recorded our conversation and the church elders will determine what to do with ungodly Pastors and men like you. Repent and restitute your ways.
(She left with her younger brother while Andy looked on like a wounded lion.)
May God deliver and purge our erring spiritual leaders and husbands in Jesus name.
If you were Sister Blessing, what would you do?
Sisters, be vigilant and take your stand by God’s grace. Don’t fall for their “anointed destiny killer rod” of sweet words and spiritual experiences.
When any man is trying to lure you into sin, flee. Your soul is precious to God.
If you haven’t surrendered your life to Jesus Christ, please, do it now. Tomorrow may be too late.
Be wary of false teachers and deceitful men!