Pst Chris Oyakhilome said this for the first time earlier this year;
“I never stand on my feet to receive any phone call from Archbishop Margaret Idahosa. I always take her calls on my knees. Why you may want to ask? When Archbishop Benson Idahosa was alive, I never spoke to him standing on my feet. I was always on my knees. Why would I not do the same for mama? Because talking to her is same as talking to him.”
One of the most important codes great, wise and successful leaders keep is the HONOUR CODE! They are very big on the necessity and indispensability of the HONOUR CODE!
They never for any reason break it. They have learnt that honour is one of the foremost principles that guarantees progress. Honour is the principal. It is a fruit of wisdom.
And in fact, only foolish & ignorant people joke with it. One of the major virtues in relating to those ahead of me is strict compliance to the HONOUR CODE!
My spiritual father, Pst Lawrence Oyor didn’t only teach me with words, much more, I have learnt by His life How He relates with those ahead of him. If you will go far, and go very far, KEEP THE HONOUR CODE!
FAMILIARITY PRECEDES DISHONOR! DISHONOUR IS THE INABILITY TO DISCERN GRACE IN THOSE AHEAD OF YOU. IT IS THE GROSS ABUSE OF ACCESS! IT IS THE TWIN SIBLING OF PRIDE!
The Bible records that Jesus couldn’t do much in His hometown of Nazareth because the people were familiar with Him. They dishonoured Him. Dishonour stifles the flow of grace & impedes the transfer of blessings.
Hebrews 7:7 shows the incontrovertible law of transference. It is the less who is blessed by the greater. It is never the other way round.
If you ever walk in dishonour, you not only limit your access, you also dishonour God who set the law in place and is the principal recipient of all acts of honour done to men!
As a principle, I never to get close to men I honour who are ahead. I know it is the nature of man to become quickly familiar with anyone.
Thus, if there’s no conscious effort to guard my heart, undue closeness sure breeds familiarity. This is another wisdom I gleaned from my Father.
Despite access to many great men, he is never in a hurry to become close as many would. For the safety of his heart, he maintains a wise distance that’s not too close & not too far away.
But today, I see many who have no regard for the HONOUR CODE. I see how people who don’t know you are blessed by a single contact with you, while those who have been unduly close fall victim to familiarity. GUARD YOUR HEART!
These few jewels I have picked up on the way, they would help you in dealing wisely in relationships with men who God has brought into your life to shift you into new seasons…
(a) BE JESUS – BE SIMPLE, BE LOVING AND BE WISE!
Don’t be complicated. Be humble. Don’t take offence. Make sure you love the man before you start honouring him. Love his person, but honour the grace he carries. So that when he does something that would offend you as he most likely would; since you are already walking in love, you would not take offence or dishonour him…
(b) BE CLOSE, BUT DON’T BE CLOSE!
Don’t ever get so close that you become familiar. Don’t also be far away that you are a stranger. You must by the Spirit strike a balance between being close and being unfamiliar. The more close you are, the less familiar you should be. Get close with the man, but never with the grace. The man can play, but the grace is a blessing all the time. It is a two-edged sword which can also cut if dishonoured.
(c) BE IN THEIR LIVES, BUT DON’T BE IN THEIR FACE!
Ensure you are not a follower who only comes to receive from the grace the man carries. Be a part of his/her life. Be a blessing to the man as you honour the grace he carries.
Don’t however take the access as an opportunity to disturb the man till he cannot bear the disturbance. Don’t become a nuisance or invade their private space.
For instance, as much as I have been privileged to be close to pst Lawrence Oyor as a personal assistant, I can count how many times I call him or chat with him. Despite the fact that I am privileged to have the private lines of some men we all love and respect, but then, I never call them or chat except when it is utterly important. And even this is a reluctant last resort.
And yet, I have seen those who abuse the privilege and would even be calling at 1am at night simply because of access!
(d) BE THE GIVER MORE THAN THE RECEIVER!
If Jesus said it is better to give than to receive, it is more true in the context of honour. Your heart would reveal that which you truly honour by your actions. Where your heart is, your treasure would follow. You can’t claim to honour a man and your substance would not go into that adventure.
If you honour a man that blesses you with spiritual substance, don’t be a fool to just be on the receiving end. Sow into that anointing or grace. Let something leave you to their lives…this is how you truly would receive from that which they carry. They may not tell you this because they want to guard their heart. Some may even tell you not to sow anything to them because they want to be sincere, be wise o. Learn from your fathers…give more than you receive from them
(e) KNOW THAT THE REAL VALUE IS THEIR WORDS NOT THEIR MONEY
Don’t be about money or access to them that you lose the essence of that which they have really to offer you. Their money has no real value in your life as much as their words. In their words is the real treasure of their person. The words of advice, most especially their instructions to you must be kept in your left hand. Don’t joke or toy with it. You will save yourself many unnecessary hurts and pains if you learn to honour their words…
Their authority and stature are revealed in their words to you per time. DON’T LET WORDS WASTE ON YOU O. DON’T MAKE IT A HABIT TO JUST BE RECEIVING MONEY FROM THEM…BE WISE
Above all, PRAY FOR THEM.
One of the most important investments you can make for them is to pray for them. Intercede. MORE THAN YOU NEED IT, THEY NEED IT. PRAY FOR THEM, IT’S IMPORTANT…
Be wise. Give your time to serve, give your substance to bless, give your heart to love, show you your love by praying for them.
DON’T BREAK THE HONOUR CODE!